Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Orphaned desire

It is an orphaned desire.

Sickened by the halfmoon dew
on my lip stained verse
half sung,
half awaiting perhaps -
the heal on scrapped knees.

Did you, did you ever see the words lisp?

Your own words -
breathing in my vaporous syntax
frozen in the nights of skinny details.

Indeed they were yours
will remain only yours -
Making love to the cliffs and folds
of the endless sky,
to the steel grey gun of a steely resolve.

Can i ask?
Did you ever feign love, then or now?

Each time those reluctant tears well up
Those sharp tearing fingers scrap the throat
Can i ask then,
Could you possibly feign it enough?


It is a mild smell on my skin -
Lazy and reluctant whispers of fragrances.

Cut deeper, much much deeper
Let the blood cleanse
the muscles
the bones.

Cut deep enough to leave a gap.
A wide yawn in that thesaurus full of desires
A skinny limb to those yellow, fading branches.

Empty the trash cans
the memories
the nothing-something stains, marks.

Erase, erase.
Cut and scrape.

And at last collapse
with a tired thud.

Drugged, intoxicated
Totally totally destroyed.
Totally broken.

15 comments:

  1. This is the first poem I have read of yours. Sheer brilliance! I especially liked it towards the end.

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  2. Just like a sniper knows how to use his rifle,you know how to use words :) Brilliant!

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  3. i could never imagine u write so well hatsofff

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  4. i actually need ur help seriously. i m applying as volunteer for jaipur literature fest n hav to ask u sumthings regarding it.ur suggestions will be very useful to me so please contact nileshkasera@gmail.com
    hope to hear from u soon

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  5. Thanks Nilesh! I am not sure if we know each other. But you can shoot me your queries at shubhrastha@gmail.com. Though i must add, i am not a huge follower of what goes around in the 'star'-struck literary festivals like the one at Jaipur. In the hope that you find the interaction useful, would appreciate your mail at the provided address.

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  6. hii..i am a bit late I guess...but nevertheless...Verses..hmmm..they aren't good for my nerves.I for one person am irrevocably in love with words and what could be better than a verse to draw me in.

    "Orphaned desire" is like something abandoned by its own creator or orphaned by the one who promised to nurture it or may be both.I do not wish to ask,its just that the thought intrigues me.

    The words you use are figurative in in their highest degrees and they evoke physical impulses(i will explain it..)Like when you say " sharp tearing fingers scrap the throat" or "Cut deep enough to leave a gap." It feels!..

    This poem transports me into a cold place where chilly winds blow..with lines like "frozen in the nights of skinny details." and "Making love to the cliffs and folds
    of the endless sky," I can feel my finger tips getting cold(that could also be because it is getting a bit too chilly out here).

    The feel it creates makes the effect even more piercin'.What I could sense the poem was about was undoing a dream that was built brick by brick..and not just undoing it but there's a plea to rip it apart..to scrape it..cut it,erase it ..cleanse it from the deepest possible place.The words are very strong ...you cant deny they come at you with a force and demand some sort of a response.Like you once said verses are more personal,I feel the same now ...for you have a chance to manipulate a bit of your prose but verses they have a will of their own..that's what I feel. This what you have written is very real and striking. It reminds me of something i read years ago but it stayed in my mind since then.It was a poem by Deepti Naval from her book "Black wind"..not that I am making any sort of comparisons...its just that it reminded me of that.And I really like the line "Did you, did you ever see the words lisp?" its so ..I dont know tangible..or may be experiential..i liked it ..its something new..:p

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  7. @Aakancha, I fear such a close reading of my verse...:D....but remember always the cardinal theory of literature, "Trust the tale and not the teller."....ha ha ha ha

    But must say, a very insightful read. Aakancha, you always inspire me with your detailed response. Thank you.

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  8. it's beautiful. All i want to say is....Just keep flowing :) You never know when you end up creating a wonder.

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  9. Really the way you have brought out that pain is remarkable .... Its enticing ..... :)

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  10. mannnn....hv to read it twice to comprehend well as connection with writing lost sumwhr back...

    bt really really liked it..thanks for writing such a peice..
    keep the gud wrk up. :)

    Richa.

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